When we are young we tend to lack criteria in our friend selection. At school age we will pick friends based on where they live or where they sit in class and less on their personality. We may even be forced to be friends with people because of what our parents say. Once we leave school and typically find out more about ourselves we are able to base our friendships on more points like personality, likes, morals and common interests.

The Good
At any age it’s important to e able to see the difference between good friends and bad friends. A good friend is someone you can trust and someone you can say anything to without fear of judgement. A true friend will be honest with you and realistic but will remain positive about your dreams and goals. They won’t put you down but will encourage you to be yourself and do your best. They will support you and help you. It’s not hard to find the right people but it helps if you look for the following in a friend:

1. Someone who supports your vision
2. Someone who encourages your vision
3. Someone who cares about your well being
4. Someone who will guide you on the right path
5. Someone who is concerned about your future
6. Someone who helps you succeed
7. Someone who will correct your mistakes
8. Someone who understands you
9. Someone who listens to you
10. Someone who shares your problems
11. Someone who protects you
12. Someone who values your opinion

The Bad
There are obvious bad friend qualities that are easily seen, like when someone tries to get you to do something that you don’t want to do. Other bad qualities are less obvious and often aren’t noticed until too late. These include things like being flattering or kind to your face but are then rude or hurtful behind your back. You may not see these qualities in a bad friend until someone else points them out and it’s often hard to believe at first. Trust your instincts. When you really look at someone you will be able to tell if they are being insincere. Bad friends are the type of people who take, take, take and give little or nothing back. They may be emotionally exhausting, consume your time or even take advantage of you financially. In any case they are not the sort of people that you need in your life. There are some questions you should ask yourself when you think you may have a bad friend. By answering these questions you’ll be able to make a decision on whether it’s time to cut your friend loose or work on the friendship.

1. Does my friend only come over if I’m making dinner, having other friends over or offering some other incentive to spend time with me?
2. Does my friend try to make me feel inferior and always try to control the conversations?
3. Is my friend in constant competitions with me and often times try to out do me in our careers, possessions and lifestyle choices?
4. Does my friend show signs of dishonesty or disrespect?
5. Does my friend let me down when I need them the most?
6. Do I hear about my friend talking behind my back or telling secrets that were supposed to be confidential?
7. Does my friend pressure me or force me to take part in activities that I don’t want to do or that are dangerous?
8. Is my friend a good influence on my children, family or other friends?
9. Does my friend try to steal the spotlight from me or belittle the things that matter most to me?
10. Does my friend get along with most people?

Friends have a strong influence on our lives, especially our decision making. Surround yourself with people who guide you to make the right decisions in life. The laws of attraction are often true. If you think negatively and surround yourself with negative people, then you will only notice the negatives in your life and will often choose the wrong path. On the other hand if you surround yourself with positive people you’ll notice the positive things in your life and will head in the right direction. Attitude is everything when it comes to your life and your relationships.